Till The Stars Had Run Away

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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
bogunicorn

Anonymous asked:

Are there any blue roses? Like real ones. Or do they just take the white, green, or red ones then paint them as blue?

detectivehole answered:

no, blue roses don’t occur in nature- but they’re easy to make artificially. just place a cut white rose into blue-dyed water and wait a bit, and eventually the rose will be blue. also why did you ask me this

detectivehole

image

i used to stick flowers in dye as a kid to make them different colors

detectivehole

image

every month i track down and kill a member of various professions so that i can absorb their workplace knowledge. last june i shredded a florist

bogunicorn
whatagrump

thinking about the premiere of black sails season 4 when silver says, "you and i have willed our men through unthinkable things to get this far. why not one more, to call nassau home again?" and flint gives him this look and it lingers just long enough for you as an audience member to think, "when has silver ever thought of nassau as home? where is this coming from?" and then you start to see all the ways he's mirroring flint, the blatant ways he's playing at a role that doesn't quite fit him, etc., and it plants the seeds for the rest of the season

it's not until season 4 that it becomes blatantly obvious that silver is a chameleon w/ absolutely no sense of self, no self-confidence, that he's extremely malleable and essentially an unknown, and the moment of flint looking at him like, "to call nassau home again? again?" sets the entire thing up!!!!

dduane
dduane

Surprise. :)

bemusedlybespectacled

romans: conquer a shitload of the known world, including parts of africa and the middle east

romans: institute a policy that says that conquered peoples are allowed to gain citizenship by military service, but also can’t serve in their home areas (because armed native soldiers + angry locals = revolt), thus requiring everyone who wants to be a citizen to work abroad for years of their lives, creating diversity.

racists: a single black person in an educational video about rome is unrealistic and i feel attacked.

heroineimages

And a lot of times legionaries settled down not far from where they served once their service was up. Some brawny Libyan kid signs on with the legions and gets stationed on the Rhine frontier. He learns to fight but also how to build roads and walls. After his service is up, he finds work as a mason, settles down with a sandy-haired German lass, and has a couple half-Libyan, half-German kids.

It ends up being a multi-generational thing when one of the kids also signs on with the legions. He gets stationed in Iberia, protecting Rome’s silver- and steel resources. He falls in love with a Celtiberian woman and has a couple quarter-Libyan, quarter-German, quarter-Celtic, quarter-Iberian kids.

Libyan kid’s grandson keeps the family tradition going by also signing up for the legions. He gets assigned to the Parthian frontier and after retirement settles down with a Syrian woman to raise a bunch of eighth-Libyan, eighth-German, eighth-Celtic, eighth-Iberian, half-Syrian kids.

And this is just from the legions. This isn’t counting trade fleets and caravans, the tourist industry, the slave-trade, or migration to Rome and provincial capitols for jobs or political reasons.

jeanjauthor

Stop clutching your pearls, racists. The Roman Empire was problematic in many ways, but racism wasn’t one of them. (They did occasionally act bigoted toward people of a specific nationality, but that was about culture, not about appearances.)

dduane

A poster boy—literally—for this diversity: black Egyptian kid grows up in Thebes (where there were a lot of people of color due to Ethiopia being next door), joins the Roman army, rises to command his largely-black home legion, and is sent with them to Gaul to deal with an uprising.

Lees verder

gallusrostromegalus
mckinlily

Plot armor but it’s Bruce Wayne’s wealth.

Bruce is one of the richest men in the world. Bruce does not want to be one of the richest men in world.

He starts by implementing high starting salaries and full health care coverages for all levels at Wayne Enterprises. This in vastly improves retention and worker productivity, and WE profits soar. He increases PTO, grants generous parental and family leave, funds diversity initiatives, boosts salaries again. WE is ranked “#1 worker-friendly corporation”, and productively and profits soar again.

Ok, so clearly investing his workers isn’t the profit-destroying doomed strategy his peers claim it is. Bruce is going to keep doing it obviously (his next initiative is to ensure all part-time and contractors get the same benefits and pay as full time employees), but he is going to have to find a different way to dump his money.

But you know what else is supposed to be prohibitively expensive? Green and ethical initiatives. Yes, Bruce can do that. He creates and fund a 10 year plan to covert all Wayne facilities to renewable energy. He overhauls all factories to employ the best environmentally friendly practices and technologies. He cuts contracts with all suppliers that engage in unethical employment practices and pays for other to upgrade their equipment and facilities to meet WE’s new environmental and safety requirements. He spares no expense.

Yeah, Wayne Enterprises is so successful that they spin off an entire new business arm focused on helping other companies convert to environmentally friendly and safe practices like they did in an efficient, cost effective, successful way.

Admittedly, investing in his own company was probably never going to be the best way to get rid of his wealth. He slashes his own salary to a pittance (god knows he has more money than he could possibly know what to do with already) and keeps investing the profits back into the workers, and WE keeps responding with nearly terrifying success.

So WE is a no-go, and Bruce now has numerous angry billionaires on his back because they’ve been claiming all these measures he’s implementing are too expensive to justify for decades and they’re finding it a little hard to keep the wool over everyone’s eyes when Idiot Softheart Bruice Wayne has money spilling out his ears. BUT Bruce can invest in Gotham. That’ll go well, right?

Gotham’s infrastructure is the OSHA anti-Christ and even what little is up to code is constantly getting destroyed by Rogue attacks. Surely THAT will be a money sink.

Except the only non-corrupt employer in Gotham city is….Wayne Enterprises. Or contractors or companies or businesses that somehow, in some way or other, feed back to WE. Paying wholesale for improvement to Gotham’s infrastructure somehow increases WE’s profits.

Bruce funds a full system overhaul of Gotham hospital (it’s not his fault the best administrative system software is WE—he looked), he sets up foundations and trusts for shelters, free clinics, schools, meal plans, day care, literally anything he can think of.

Gotham continues to be a shithole. Bruce Wayne continues to be richer than god against his Batman-ingrained will.

Oh, and Bruice Wayne is no longer viewed as solely a spoiled idiot nepo baby. The public responds by investing in WE and anything else he owns, and stop doing this, please.

Bruce sets up a foundation to pay the college tuition of every Gotham citizen who applies. It’s so successful that within 10 years, donations from previous recipients more than cover incoming need, and Bruce can’t even donate to his own charity.

But by this time, Bruce has children. If he can’t get rid of his wealth, he can at least distribute it, right?

Except Dick Grayson absolutely refuses to receive any of his money, won’t touch his trust fund, and in fact has never been so successful and creative with his hacking skills as he is in dumping the money BACK on Bruce. Jason died and won’t legally resurrect to take his trust fund. Tim has his own inherited wealth, refuses to inherit more, and in fact happily joins forces with Dick to hack accounts and return whatever money he tries to give them. Cass has no concept of monetary wealth and gives him panicked, overwhelmed eyes whenever he so much as implies offering more than $100 at once. Damian is showing worrying signs of following in his precious Richard’s footsteps, and Babs barely allows him to fund tech for the Clocktower. At least Steph lets him pay for her tuition and uses his credit card to buy unholy amounts of Batburger. But that is hardly a drop in the ocean of Bruce’s wealth. And she won’t even accept a trust fund of only one million.

Jason wins for best-worst child though because he currently runs a very lucrative crime empire. And although he pours the vast, vast majority of his profits back into Crime Alley, whenever he gets a little too rich for his tastes, he dumps the money on Bruce. At this point, Bruce almost wishes he was being used for money laundering because then he’s at least not have the money.

So children—generous, kindhearted, stubborn till the day they die the little shits, children—are also out.

Bruce was funding the Justice League. But then finances were leaked, and the public had an outcry over one man holding so much sway over the world’s superheroes (nevermind Bruce is one of those superheroes—but the public can’t know that). So Bruce had to do some fancy PR trickery, concede to a policy of not receiving a majority of funds from one individual, and significantly decrease his contributions because no one could match his donations.

At his wits end, Bruce hires a team of accounts to search through every crinkle and crevice of tax law to find what loopholes or shortcuts can be avoided in order to pay his damn taxes to the MAX.

The results are horrifying. According to the strictest definition of the law, the government owes him money.

Bruce burns the report, buries any evidence as deeply as he can, and organizes a foundation to lobby for FAR higher taxation of the upper class.

All this, and Wayne Enterprises is happily chugging along, churning profit, expanding into new markets, growing in the stock market, and trying to force the credit and proportionate compensation on their increasingly horrified CEO.

Bruce Wayne is one of the richest men in the world. Bruce Wayne will never not be one of the richest men in the world.

But by GOD is he trying.

bogunicorn
whynotfabulous

In an effort to avoid supporting megacorporations, I shall now be posing questions directly to tumblr that I would otherwise have googled.

whynotfabulous

If Mayonnaise is just eggs and oil, why it creamy?

gnomer-denois

Because it's also evil

whynotfabulous

Thanks!

Have scientists figured out what dark matter is yet?

you-can-be-what-you-want-to-be

Yup! It’s anything that takes up space, has mass, and is goth.

whynotfabulous

Wow!

What happens if you eat 23 packages of peeps?

trashboi413

You meet god

whynotfabulous

Thank goodness!

What's the correct way to eat a banana?

treslecheslife

Whole, in one gulp.

whynotfabulous

Delicious!

Who is the Muffin Man?

captain-oh-no-not-again

Father of the Muffin Boy

whynotfabulous

Makes sense!

Why is my car making a ker-klunk noise?

mayflydecember

Car's haunted

whynotfabulous

Uh Oh

How to fix a haunted car?

babybluebanshee

Slam into a priest in a crosswalk going at least forty miles an hour

whynotfabulous

It worked!

Where does the wax in scented candles go?

thegoodsandy

into the sky, where it turns into stars

whynotfabulous

Cool!

Why are weddings so damn expensive?

daeynore

priest has to pay for medical bills related to haunted car crashing into him

whynotfabulous

....Ah

gehe-lihiyot-androgynos-varda
spaceshipsandpurpledrank

queenstravelingdarling

We can’t have a midlife crisis, our entire existence has been a crisis. Enjoy doing grand folks shit my fellow millennials ❤️

ramshacklefey

The entire idea behind midlife crisis is based on the person having gotten "everything" by their late 20s and then realizing that none of it was what they wanted. If you've been systematically barred from obtaining the things that you're supposed to want, then you're way more likely to pursue the things you actually want, something which has for many years been denied to anyone in the USA before the age of 60 or so.

dappercyborg

@eroticcannibal

anationofthieves
chrlesvane

black sails rewatch - XXX.

Said if I turned over the cache, you’d be safe. And it ain’t just the lie. She tried to take you away from me. When I left that island… all I could think about was having a chance to make her pay… for what she done. Now that we’re here… it would be so easy. And I don’t wanna do it. Don’t wanna live with it after. The sight of her hurt in that way. Just don’t want it. That fucking island. Makes you do shit you don’t wanna do. How is it we haven’t figured that out by now? What the hell are we doing back here, Jack?

anationofthieves
chrlesvane

black sails rewatch - XXXIII.

- He said the reason Flint’s fleet never got warning about the barricade in the harbor wasn’t because Mr. Featherstone didn’t relay it… it wasn’t because Max intercepted it… he said it was because you never sent it in the first place.
- And they all believed him.
- I don’t think that anyone actually believed it. You weren’t indicted based on the facts, or our suspicions of your motives. He just said it. I think no one had the balls to defy him.